khong11's Xanga

where am i?

Wed, 16 Jan 2008 19:04:18 GMT

hey xanga friends...

yeah. i don't use this anymore. my new favorite place to be? facebook.

come find me and stay in touch! :)

adios!

i heart harry potter...

Mon, 06 Aug 2007 17:15:32 GMT

Find out your Harry Potter personality at LiquidGeneration!

on other quizzes i took, i was fred and george weasley, and ron weasley. apparently...i fit in well with the weasley family. as long as i don't take a quiz and it comes back saying i'm percy... is anyone else looking forward to the Harry Potter theme park coming in 2009/2010? i can't wait. i'm really looking forward to it. totally want to go.

i know i haven't written for a while. not much to update. my back has been hurting a lot for the past several weeks. i can't get it to heal. and i think my allergies are starting up again. great. i've been dogsitting since july 23 and i can't wait to go home and sleep in my own bed again. just 4 more days to go!

and...i go on vacation in less than 10 days. yippee!!! i can't wait. it's going to be a blast.

okay...all for now.

been a long time...

Fri, 29 Jun 2007 18:00:08 GMT

(the new die hard movie was really fun! if john mclane and jack bauer got into a fight - i just don't know who would win. they are both that tough. )

wow. it's been almost a month since my last entry. i almost forgot about xanga! eek.

in the past several weeks, my life has been all about training. but not the actual training part - pulling off the training. running errands, setting meal plans, buying snacks, prepping snacks, setting up, tearing down, driving all over creation...this is what i have been doing for the past few weeks, and what i will keep doing until july 4! i'm looking forward to a nice break afterwards. it's been a crazy month of training, but i'm in the home stretch. yippee!

on another newsfront: my parents sold their house in huntley!!!! hooray! i'm so happy for them. this means that my dad will be officially retiring from 46 years of work at the end of july and he will finally move out to las vegas. it will be a tough thing for my dad - to all of a sudden not have to get up and go to work after all these years of pushing himself to create a good life for him and his family. if you think of it - please pray for my dad. for this major life transition into retirement, and for he and my mom to finally be together after a year living in different states. pray for their relationship and for them to adapt well to living under the same roof again.

i got to talk to one of my really really great friends forever (RRGFF) from college last night (lizzie!!!). it was SO good to hear her voice and talk to her. it's been several months since we last spoke and there was so much to catch up on. she's pregnant and due this month!!! i can't wait to hear all about the birth and to someday meet him! they're naming him aiden (or aedin) oliver. it's so cute! i really miss her, and it was great to find out how she is doing with her pregnancy and with marriage and everything. *sigh* all my friends keep moving to seattle - maybe it's a sign?

well...that's about it. i'm looking forward to some vacation coming up in july and august. my mom is coming to chicago on july 16 to help my dad pack up the rest of their stuff and then she'll drive with him back to las vegas. and she's going to come up to madison for a few days to hang out with me. hooray! i'm looking forward to that. and then in august, i'm going with bora to boston to help her get settled before she starts law school. i'm super excited about this trip. it will be a nice long road trip, and we'll have fun doing touristy things before she gets all scholarly.

alrighty, well have a good weekend, friends! and a happy fourth of july!

home alone...

Mon, 04 Jun 2007 00:41:38 GMT

just watched: Pirates of the Caribbean 3: At World's End

my house family is gone this week for a mini-vacation, so i have the house all to myself. it's great! i'm enjoying some rest and quiet, but my big goal for the week is to finish unpacking all that i can. i still have a lot of stuff in the garage, and i need to condense it down and get it ready for storage so i feel more settled. i just hope i don't put it off til the last minute!

had a fun weekend with bora. got to brookfield around 3pm on saturday. bora and i just drove around, went to the mall, walked around and browsed through shops. then we had a great dinner at cheesecake factory (and i have leftovers...yay!), followed by some more window shopping and watching pirates of the carribean 3 (BAD movie...REALLY bad).

then this morning, we woke up early to go to church before going to the Brewers/Marlins game. it was a low-scoring game, but the Brewers won and it was fun to go to a game. it was sold-out and the stadium was packed! we got a prince fielder bobble-head too. fun stuff. maybe it will be worth something someday. who knows.

now i'm at home, chillin' and watchin' tv. i'll probably go to bed early (sad, i know), but until then i'll just enjoy some much needed down time.

hope you all have a good week!

the light at the end of the tunnel...

Sat, 26 May 2007 03:50:06 GMT

well, folks, good news. I AM MOVED!!!!!!!!!!

i am SO grateful for all the people who helped me pack, clean, and move over these past several weeks...it's just so overwhelming. i feel very loved and very thankful. thanks to bora, becks, young and tim, steve and aggie, yii-shyun, diana, kara, jeremy and amanda, renee, lydia, joan, esther, keith and amy, kyra, kaeden, and GOD. i hope i didn't forget anyone. it's been a long few weeks!

it took us 1.5 hours to pack up the Uhaul, move and unload it all. i can't believe how much stuff i have. it was hard enough condensing down into one room, but WOW. i thought i got rid of so much stuff...and yet, it still seems like a lot. i know i can unpack most of it and put it in the room i am living in, but still. WOW.

i am done unpacking for tonight. my back is killing me, but i am not even paying attention to it. i am just so relieved to be moved. i feel more settled now than i have for almost a month. it just feels so GOOD to be moved and here at my new home. i am so grateful to the hirata ohana for allowing me to live here. they are so generous and hospitable and very accomodating!

tomorrow i will be going back to my apartment to finish cleaning up. my good friend, amanda, is going to help me. praise the Lord! :) then...an afternoon at Brat Fest (if the weather cooperates) and more unpacking and settling in. i can see the light at the end of the tunnel...it's bright and cheery. :) hooray for good friends, and a place to call home.

out with the old...

Sun, 13 May 2007 14:44:19 GMT

well, i just said goodbye to my last piece of heirloom furniture. it was more emotional than i thought it was. sadness caught me off-guard as i saw my family's piano being rolled away. that piano, although not really fancy and very old, has been in family ever since my mother was a little girl. it's been moved around so many times, has sat in so many different living rooms. it's been overseas and back, has lived in 3 or 4 different states and 2 countries. my mother learned to play on it, i learned to play on it, and my brother learned to play on it. it was sad to see it go, but i know i can't lug it around with me everywhere i go, nor do i really want to. it's going to a good home - to a 14-year old girl who dreams of becoming a choir director and needs to learn how to play the piano. hopefully, it will see 7 or 8 more years before the end of it's time.

getting rid of my furniture was a very necessary but very sad process for me. the majority of things i owned belonged to my late grandmother. the sofa bed, recliner, bookcase, table, chairs, end tables and lamps all lived in a tiny apartment in southern illinois for decades. growing up, i sat on those chairs, i ate at that table, i slept in that sofa bed. i fought over the recliner with my brother. i put drinks on those end tables. and now, it's all gone. and it feels like it's not just furniture that i got rid of, but pieces of my family. i know that's not true, but i feel a little empty, like this apartment.

i know it will only last for a short while, and this emptiness isn't a fatal emptiness. it's a symbol of turning over another leaf. of moving on. out with the old, in with the new. it's scary to start fresh. i have a blank slate. i feel like i'm going off to college for the first time - by myself, alone, embarking on a new adventure. where will it take me? where will i end up? who will i meet along the way? giving away furniture is just the start of turning over this new leaf in my life. what else will come along? stay tuned...

tidbits...

Wed, 09 May 2007 04:05:18 GMT

a few random updates and tidbits for y'all:

things are disappearing from my apartment! hooray! couch and recliner - SOLD, table and chairs - SOLD, bookcases - SOLD, end tables and lamps - SOLD, piano bench - SOLD, piano - DONATED. hooray! what a relief!
two of my RRGFFs (really really great friends forever) moved away last week. i was really sad. but this week has actually been okay. i get to see them on saturday when they come back to help me clean the apartment, and i'll see them next weekend at my former roommate's wedding. i think the grieving process is coming to a close! hooray!
it feels good to purge stuff. i'm donating 3 large trash bags of clothing to goodwill, plus several boxes and bags of miscellaneous items. i'm really downsizing so i can move in with this family, and i'm starting to get used to the idea of moving on and transitioning.
i've been avoiding transition for a while now, probably due to denial. but these past few weeks with people leaving, me packing and getting ready to move out, things with my job and future still unknown, have forced me to face my fears head-on.
relationships are hard, challenging, nurturing, exciting, emotional, hilarious, wonderful, and central to my life. whether it be friends or family, i can't live without relationships, and it's so hard to say goodbye to those you love when they move away. my former roommate told me a great quote before she left. i will butcher it, but here it goes: "you'll know when you did relationships the right way when it's painful to leave. leave in such a way that it hurts." or something like that. she'll just have to post a comment with the real saying, but y'all get the jist.
intervarsity staff are amazing people. i love being a part of this staff family, and when i do leave intervarsity, it will be one of the most difficult and saddest days of my life. a joyful sadness, but still a sadness. i will need a lot of time to mourn and grieve when i leave.
still unsure of what my future holds. small, tiny, baby steps are being made. but at least they are small steps forward. still working on the ins and outs of what this next year will hold. do i stay one more year? do i stay part of a year? where do i go from here? not sure.
still waiting on God for an answer. patience and being content in this constant fuzziness is not fun for me. and i feel like there is a wall built up between myself and God that is prohibiting me from receiving what God has in store for me. i need to figure out how to tear it down, but i have to identify it first, own up to it, accept it and work on tearing it down. again...small baby steps.
this is definitely going to be a year of growth and maturity for me. it's going to make or break me, or do both. should be an interesting ride! must remember to keep all arms and legs inside the vehicle at all times. hope i don't lose any appendages.
i really need a vacation. i want to go somewhere fun and new, but i don't want to go alone. and i don't want to go to the same place i always go (las vegas). but i definitely NEED to get away for a while. need to clear my head...relax...NOT THINK. just be. enjoy. do. have fun. i need fun...

okay, that's all for me. just a quick update. which turned out to be longer than i anticipated. ah well...you'll either read it or you won't. no pressure. hehehe.

on the brink of feeling really sad...

Mon, 30 Apr 2007 16:44:29 GMT

this is going to be a sad week for me. two of my closest friends here in madison are moving away. i don't think i'll really feel the loss until next week when they are both truly gone (even though i know i'll see them again...and soon!). i think it's just the thought of feeling lonely in an empty apartment that is making me sad (literally - our furniture is disappearing slowly piece by piece). i'm so thankful for the friendships that will still be here in madison, but this is still a very difficult process for me. relationships are like food to me - they give me sustenance and energy and are a key lifesource. when people move away, i fear what will become of those friendships (i'm a really terrible long-distance friend...as some of you know!). this is a week that makes me feel sad, and this is a week that i recognize how much i need to depend on Jesus for comfort and companionship in the midst of my loneliness.

what is honor, really?

Sun, 22 Apr 2007 03:41:01 GMT

what does it mean to truly honor someone?

according to various definitions, honor is about holding someone in high respect. it's an action that dignifies a person and gives them special recognition. it's greatly tied to upholding and revering their integrity. but when honor is tied to cultural values, it makes the whole honoring process seem even messier! the question i struggle with is, how do you honor someone who doesn't exemplify any of these qualities, regardless of the cultural value?

i find it very difficult to honor someone when they demand honor and respect because it is your cultural "duty" to provide it, yet their words and actions are not honorable, respectful or full of integrity. i know that in those instances where great injustice is being served, i cannot hold my tongue or my temper, and my self-control greatly lacks along with the company of the other fruits of the Spirit. in instances where an argument has pursued, i know when i have done wrong and when i have not acted honorably or with any respect at all. but i have such a strong guilt/shame complex that i just can't deal with anything until i have apologized for my actions and reconciled. but when the other person doesn't reciprocate or own up to their faults as well, i just can't see the justice in honoring that person with respect or an apology. when it is demanded and expected of me to honor that person, and they don't see the wrongs that they have committed, where is the justice in that? it only puffs up their ego to be honored and respected and apologized to, and it gives them no humility to say "hey, you know what, i messed up too and i'm sorry." (on a side note - "i'm sorry, but..." is NOT an apology.)

so, if i am supposed to be an agent of reconciliation, and i am supposed to reconcile with those i am in disagreement with...what should it look like? it's one thing when believers reconcile with each other, but what does reconciliation look like with an unbeliever? what does honoring an unbeliever look like? when they aren't convicted of their pride because the Spirit is not living in them, and they still expect you to give them the honor they think they deserve because it's culturally engrained in them, do you just suck it up and do it knowing that they may never change and you may always have to just grin and bear it?

i guess it's that whole "turning the other cheek" thing. i've never been good at that. i don't like getting beat up on, and my character and self-esteem are too fragile to take such a beating all the time. i need a thicker skin so i can suck it up and roll with the punches. anyone know where i can find one?

life in the fast lane...

Mon, 16 Apr 2007 02:50:43 GMT

i can't believe how quickly the days are going by. it's already mid-April, i have to have my things packed, sold, and moved out in about a month and i can't seem to catch up as these days keep passing me by. where is all the time going?

all my weekends have been full for the past 4 weeks (i'll post some pics eventually):

4 really quick trips to chicago (3 this week alone!)
1 baby shower (for the mama of "Frodo")
1 afternoon of hiking (1st time at the Arboretum - LOVED it!)
1 really great concert (Shane & Shane ROCK)
1 family visit (hard, but life-changing, i think - LOTS to think and pray about)
1 life-planning session (with my 2nd boss)
1 bridal shower (for Lucy, which was amazing thanks to Bora and Becky!)
1 museum (Body Worlds at the MSI - amazing! tickles the science nerd within me)
and 4 meals at Mexican restaurants this week (craziness - my tummy is retaliating)

just got back around 9:45pm tonight from my most recent trip to Chicago and now i have to pack to leave tomorrow morning at 5:30am to check-in for my 7:16am flight to Harrisburg, PA. i'll be helping one of my team members sort through his 40+ years worth of files from being an InterVarsity staffworker. we'll be purging and retaining files for our department, then we go into 4 days of meetings with the rest of our team. good thing McAlisterville (where we are meeting) is peaceful and quiet. i hope to have some time for reflection - i REALLY need to slow down, but i just can't until this week is over.

pray for me, y'all. feelings of anxiety and being overwhelmed are...well...overwhelming me. i need to learn to tell myself the TRUTH about a lot of things that are going on in my life right now, and stop listening to the lies that Satan keeps throwing at me. instead, i need to be honest with myself, own up to my junk and start kicking my butt in gear and making changes. i desperately need prayer - especially for motivation and perseverance. God performs miracles, and i need to not be afraid to ask for some. thanks, Friends.